The Haircut Chronicles
by Phoenixfyretail
Summary: In which everyone is shaggy and everyone seems to know how to cut hair. Slight Crack fic, no particular plot line. Characters and references from Invasion, read that first. Contains well developed OC's. Contains: Jealousy, haircut abilities, slight groping, and blushing.
1. Carlos

I watched as Carlos flipped his hair out of his face for about the tenth time today, his expression growing more and more irritated as he did so. Leaning against the counter, I watched as he seemed to think about something, and then blew his hair out of his face when it flopped in his eyes again. I snickered in laughter, hiding it with my hand.

He looks at me, beyond exasperated. Though he was clearly also trying not to laugh as I kept laughing, snorting when he rolled his eyes at me.

"Need help Carlos?" I ask, still calming down from my laughing fit. Pagan comes into the room to see what was going on as well, an eyebrow raised in amusement when he sees the smile on my face.

"Dear god, please. Help." Carlos answers, turning to me and ignoring Pagan's snicker. I turn and search in the kitchen drawer for the scissors that I know are there. Once I find them, I turn to Carlos.

"Grab a chair and meet me on the porch. I'll be down in a second." I turn and run up the stairs. I need a comb if I'm going to do this right. As I come back down the stairs, I hear Pagan move to meet me at the base of the steps.

"Will you trim me up too, after Carlos?" I smile, and nod.

"Of course!" He smiles back in agreement, before running a hand through my long hair.

"You need a trim too. I'll do it for you." He is very serious as he says this. I nod, and walk out to the porch where Carlos is waiting, his bandanna loose around his neck instead of over his face. His eyes are half closed in the sunlight, as he was sitting in a warm beam of light.

"Hey!" I say, slipping the scissors and comb into my pocket, walking behind him to untie his bandanna. He is sitting in the chair he brought out, his posture loose and relaxed, a soft expression on his face. I tuck his bandanna in my back pocket, and ponder my next problem.

"Er… Carlos?" I say, not quite sure how to delicately bring this one up.

"Yeah?" He asks, turning his head to raise a brow at me. His dark eyes are almost amused, and glinting happily out in the sunlight. He looks almost like he knows what I'm going to ask.

"You're going to need to take your shirt off unless you want hair in it."

Without a word, he shucks his shirt off, laying the red tank top over his left thigh. I sigh, and try not to drool at the tanned shoulders and back revealed, before running a comb through his clean, and still slightly damp from a recent shower, hair. He sighs at the gentle sensation and sits up straighter, allowing me easier access.

I section the top off from the sides, and start trimming off the excess shag. I begin with the back, having him tip his head forward to reach the base of his neck. After trimming the hair there to a neat length that won't let him overheat in the tropical weather, I work my way up, combing it smooth and trimming each section to the length set before it. He doesn't move throughout the entire process of shearing off nearly three inches of excess hair, and only shifts his head to one side or the other to make it easier to reach around his ears.

I come to stand in front of him, and he looks up at me, watching my expression with a soft smile. I haven't done the top yet, but still, he looks considerably less like a shaggy beast now.

"Almost done." I smile, and move to his side, absently brushing hair off of his shoulder as I do so. I watch his dark eyes flick to where I had touched him, and a soft blush spread across his cheeks. Interesting.

I comb through the shaggy hair on top of his head, and, after brushing my shaggy locks out of my face for the umpteenth time, begin cutting off the excess length. He's back to what he looked like when I first met him; relatively short hair, slight stubble on the face, but his eyes are different. They are significantly warmer and less worried now, more peaceful.

I finish the last section on the left side and move to the right, checking to make sure that they are even. After I trim up his slight sideburns by his ears, as he is clean shaven normally, I then come in front of him to finish the hair that was in his face.

"Close your eyes." He does so, and, after combing the hair through, I carefully shear off the shaggy mass of black that had been in his face. I run my fingers through it, and smile when I see that it's back to its usual shaggy mess, not obscenely shaggy mess. His eyes open and he looks up at me, and he gives me a smile.

"Done?"

"Yes! Hang on…" I brush the hair off of his back and shoulders as he stands up, and then step back, surveying my work. The sides are neat and trim, cut shorter than the slightly longer length on top, creating a sort of faux hawk. It looks good on him, especially given that his hair has a bit of a wave and is a deep black.

"Okay, now you can put your shirt back on." I say, blushing and scratching the back of my head awkwardly. He smiles at me and pats my head, then puts his shirt back on.

"Thanks Gwen. That was driving me crazy."

I smile up at him, and follow him inside, going upstairs to find a hair tie, as my hair was in my face again. He follows me up, hand rubbing the back of his head. I watch as he enters the bathroom and flicks on the light, blinking at his reflection in the mirror.

"Holy hell. How did you do that?" He asks, turning his head this way and that, seemingly unable to believe it. I pop my head into the bathroom, making sure that my pony tail looks decent.

"Magic! I'm going to go trim Pagan's hair now. Be back!" I say, giving him a cheesy smile to his fake glare at my magic comment. He shakes his head, smiling, and pats my shoulder.

"Get out of here, silly."

As I walk down the hallway, nearly silently on bare feet, I hear his last comment.

"I can't remember the last time someone was that gentle with me."


	2. Pagan

After heading back downstairs, thinking about what Carlos had said last, I nearly bump into Pagan who is standing by the door.

"Pagan! Don't do that!" I say, jumping back a bit and narrowing my eyes at him as he grins.

"Apologies. But I must ask, how did you do Carlos's hair like that? You must have training." He opens the door and lets me go through first. I go through and answer him slowly, not willing to bring up my life before Rook Island. Pagan sits down in the chair after brushing off the hair that was still there.

"I used to trim my friend's and my own hair back in America. I took a brief cosmetology course before I enrolled in the FBI. It's not a big deal." I say, cleaning my comb and scissors off. Pagan shucks his own shirt off, but I find that not looking at his bare torso isn't a problem for me. Huh. I hear Carlos come out onto the porch behind me, and I watch as he goes to stand a few feet away, enjoying the peaceful day.

I flick my comb through Pagan's now shaggy blond hair, eyeing the strands in front of me.

"You're going to lose about an inch. Just a heads up." I say, sectioning the long top strands off and combing the back and sides even.

"That's quite alright." He says, closing his eyes and stilling. I can feel Carlos's dark eyes on me. I start with the back and trim his hair shorter than I did Carlos's, as I knew that Pagan preferred an undercut. I didn't have a set of clippers with me though, so he would have to make do with a short cut under the longer strands.

I finish the back quietly, and cut the sides, asking Pagan to tip his head from side to side to make trimming around his ears easier. Once that was done, I come around to the front to check my work. He already looks much better, and when I nod in satisfaction, his eyes open.

"Looking good, hmm?" I raise a brow at him, but smirk. I can feel Carlos's seething glare in his direction and I have to try to not laugh at his unnecessary jealousy.

"Less like a shaggy beast yes." I say, deadpanning, trying desperately not to laugh at his somewhat astonished gaze. I hear Carlos snort in laughter, slapping a hand to his mouth to hide his smile. Pagan smirks at him, and closes his eyes again.

I comb through the blond locks and point cut through each section, giving him a shorter length, but the layered look that he favored. I finish by layering his bangs, sweeping the blond length to the side as he liked it. I nod in satisfaction and sweep the hair off of his shoulders, but there wasn't much. He hadn't lost nearly as much hair as Carlos had. He stands up and puts his shirt back on, and gives me a smile.

"Thank you very much." I smile bacdk and nod.

"You're welcome."

I brush off the chair and then go stand beside Carlos, and Pagan goes inside, presumably to check out his new haircut. Carlos gruffly puts his arm around my waist, and pulls me close to his side. I jerk in surprise when his fingers slip into my back pocket, pulling out his bandanna that I had put there. He's blushing, but he doesn't look at me as he tucks it in his pocket.

"I'll be cutting your hair." He growls, and I can see the jealousy emanating off of him.

I touch my hand to his hip gently, trying to calm him down. He looks down at me, surprised.

"Do you even know how?" I ask, keeping my voice gentle. He strokes his hands through my long and dark hair, after removing the tie that held it up. I sigh and drop my head to his chest, finding that I can't remember the last time someone gently touched my hair like this.

"Of course I do." He answers in his usual gruff manner, continuing to sift his talented hands through the dark strands, my hair tie on his wrist. I hear Pagan start to come back out on the porch, before he evidently thinks better of it and closes the door, staying inside.

"It looks great Gwen! Thanks again!" I hear him say, and then the sound of the kitchen door opening and him leaving through the back door.

I can practically feel Carlos's smirk of manly pride.


	3. Gwen

After Carlos stands with me for a short while, making sure that Pagan is gone for some weird reason, he gestures for me to go sit in the chair. He runs his big hands through my hair carefully, and then a thought seems to hit him.

"How short do you want this to be?" He asks, fishing the comb and scissors from my pocket, being careful not to pull my hair.

"Not too short. Try to keep it long." I say, relaxing down into the gentle tugging of his hands and the comb. His hands freeze suddenly, and I frown, wondering why, but then it hits me.

"Did Vaas cut a chunk out of this or something!?" He asks, holding up the shorter section in the back, obviously more than pissed off. I had a small section of hair that was significantly shorter than the rest, smack dab in the middle of the rest of my hair.

I look down at my shoes. I had forgotten about that. When we had gone up against Vaas for the last time, he had held me captive, and in the process of my rescue I had lost a huge section of my hair to a machete.

"Why didn't you tell me, Gwen? I like your hair." He says, mumbling the last part, evidently not having planned to admit that out loud. I smile at his comment, and look up again.

"Just neaten it up for me?"

He sighs and resumes combing, but doesn't respond. I'll take that as a yes. The shorter section just brushes the back of my shoulders, so I'm going to lose almost a foot of hair. I hear Carlos mumble quietly behind me, and I turn to raise a brow at him.

"Repeat that please?" I almost laugh as he blushes even more.

"You… You're gonna need to take your shirt off or something." He mumbles, his face so red his shirt almost seems to pale in comparison. He looks almost like a tan tomato. I turn back around, and after making sure that I'm wearing a sports bra, slip my blue tank top off.

His hands stop moving through my hair, seemingly afraid of touching the skin revealed along the length of my back. After a few seconds of staring at the sight of my back to him in just my sports bra and jean shorts, he resumes combing out the last tangles in my dark hair.

He starts by trimming the short length evenly across, and I make sure not to move at the gentle sensation of his finger tips on my back and the brief touch of the scissors on my shoulder. He combs through it again, and he carefully starts trimming the longer strands of hair off, matching it to the short length.

I sit calmly, eyes closed, enjoying the gentle sensations of his hands and the comb through my hair. I hear him mumble something under his breath, and after some mental gymnastics, figure it out to be something along the lines of, "Fucking Vaas destroyed this."

Carlos combs through it once more and cuts the last section in the back, and hums in approval at his work. He comes around to the front, and his face explodes in a blush, but he checks the front, and finds that the length is much longer than the back.

Carefully, he goes about cutting the long strands to equal the back, and he accidentally grazes my left breast as he does so. He freezes in shock for about two seconds, but when I give no reaction, he breathes out and returns to hair cutting.

He finishes the front and checks for even length, and I open my eyes. He nods in approval, and catches my eye. I give him a smile, and he smiles slightly back.

"Looking good?" I ask, and he raises a brow.

"Yep. You're done." I stand up, and he brushes a long section of hair off of my shoulder. I run my hands through my now very much shorter hair, and shake the loose strands out of it. His calloused hands brush them off of my back, and I jerk slightly when they come precariously close to my ass.

I hear him step back and chuckle, before tucking the scissors and comb back in his pocket and grabbing the chair, bringing it back inside. I follow after him, putting my shirt back on as I do so. After heading up stairs and popping into the bathroom, I flick on the light, not quite sure what to expect.

My jaw drops at what I see. Carlos evidently did know how to cut hair well, as it was neatly cut to lay in one length all around my shoulders, the ends laying between my shoulder blades. I turn my head from side to side, admiring the way my hair shines in the light and the side part that had been fixed up.

"Wow. How the hell did he do that?" I ask quietly, and I hear his chuckle from behind me.

"I told you I knew how, Gwen." He says, coming into view and smirking his smug ass off.

I roll my eyes and turn to leave, with him watching me. I get a wicked expression on my face just as I'm about to leave and I smack him on the ass. I hear his yelp of surprise, followed by his evil sounding chuckle and grin. I take off running for the woods, laughing.

"Oh, you're shark bait Chica. Get back here!" He comes running after me, smiling all the way.


End file.
